There is a huge difference between acquaintances and friends. I’ve always had a wonderful number of acquaintances – people with whom I enjoyed doing a certain activity; people in a same club with the same interests; people joined by a circumstance or location, then going our separate ways, promising to try to keep up, but inevitably fading away, due to the busy-ness of our lives, lack of time and energy, etc.
I have had very few real friends – and all of these as an adult. There is something I see in a person’s eyes, a deepness that speaks of loss without words. We ‘recognize’ each other immediately and feel a closeness. We’re drawn to each other, already feeling as if we know each other.
If you’re lucky, you will have a real friend. This is a friendship that will last years and years and doesn’t depend on where you are or how long it’s been since you last spoke. When you reunite, it’s as if you never left, you pick up and go on, never losing speed, filling in the gaps and building again.
Sometimes you ‘meet’ people on the Internet. You may meet each other once or never actually get to meet face-to-face. It doesn’t matter. The friendship grows piece by piece, kindness by kindness, built by feeling free to share your real thoughts, hopes, dreams, disappointments, losses, hurts, joys, celebrations – all without judgment on either side. How amazing is that?
You only want the best for each other. You want to encourage them to do things that bring them happiness, fulfilment, joy.
You feel with them, laugh and cry with them, help each other through the ups and downs of life.
If you’re lucky, these friendships will build and build over years until you are each other’s second self.
If you’re lucky enough to find a friend like this, tell them how much they mean to you, how much you treasure their friendship and love. There will never be another bond like this. It’s unique and beautiful.
We stretched, then walked up and down the long, well-lit, well-paved parking lot for 30 minutes this morning before dawn, the last day we need to do this before the gym reopens after deep-cleaning and maintenance.
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It’s “The Cool Season” here in Chiang Mai, Thailand (my first) and I’m having a bit of difficulty adapting. The low is supposed to be 50 with the highs in the low 80s from November 1st until around February 15th. I love the afternoons, but struggle a bit to stay warm in the early mornings and evenings.
There is no heat here – 3/4 of the year is really hot, so they gear up with air conditioners for that and just weather through (pardon the pun) the cooler season. No space heaters are considered safe. Same with electric blankets. I am learning to dress in layers, heat up water to drink if needed, take warm showers (instant heaters there), and enjoy being able to sit beside my window when the sun comes up.
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My massage therapist has gone home to be with her family, so I won’t have my weekly massage today. Instead, I’ll do an extra-long session of “Old Lady” yoga stretches to try to make up for it.
Khun Nong, my wonderful cleaning lady, comes this afternoon, so I will vacate the premises so she can clean in peace. Brian and I will go the cafe to be out of her way. I’ll take my sketchbook and supplies, my Kindle, my earbuds so I can listen to music, and my sweatshirt, in case they have the temperature in freezer mode. 🥶
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I am starting today to try to add to the pathetic list of Thai phrases I can say. I can say, “Hello, and have a blessed day,” (sounds like ,‘sawat dee KA’-ah) and “Thank you.”(sounds like, ‘cawp coon KA’-ah)
For a while I gave myself a pass because my husband had a stroke, I was moving into a new condo, I was in a strange place trying to recover from having to have a pacemaker installed due to my heart stopping twice Feb. 11th in the ER at the hospital. After the hospitalization and surgeries, I discovered my hearing was significantly affected, plus my balance. I now have good hearing aids, and I’m working on re-training my brain on the balance and inner ear issues.
So, no more excuses. My plan is to add one new phrase each week. This week’s phrase is “sorry.”I have a really good source of YouTube videos with two ladies teaching Thai phrases. My son, Brian, says their pronunciation is good and is encouraging me to imitate them as closely as I can. (He also reminds me that I frown when I’m concentrating, so I’m trying to remember to try to keep a pleasant, smiling face while I’m trying to come up with the proper phrase…🤪)
This is part of honoring the traditions and language and customs of Thailand, my new home. I am slow, but I will really try hard to show everyone how happy I am to be here.
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Thai Bananas – Nam Wah
One of the cleaning ladies gave Brian a bunch of Thai bananas a couple of days ago!
And one of the ladies in the office came running to catch me yesterday as I was going to pick up a coffee from the delivery area. She held the elevator for me and gave me a bag of these Thai tangerines!
Both of these show how wonderful the people in our building are. Brian gave cards with a hand-written note and a bit of cash to each of the staff here for New Year’s. I had given each person a hand-painted Christmas cards earlier. The kindness of Thai people is the thing that stands out beyond all else here. They continue to ask about Brian’s dad in the nursing home, and come up and hug me, asking how I am (with Brian’s translation.) I’m simply overwhelmed.
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I hope that you are entering 2026 with a wide-open heart, hopeful that we will all enjoy a new year full of reasons to smile.