I’ve been feeling sorry for myself lately because I have lost a lot of my friends, or that many of the ones I have are having really tough times. Not just ‘aquaintances,’ or ‘nice people to pal around with,’ but long-term true friends, those deep-in-the-gut friends you have shared with over many, many years, who you would drop everything and go help when possible, and know that they would do it for you, as well.
I have received texts and emails, and even obits lately and just felt sadder and sadder.
All of a sudden, though, it occurred to me that I need to give myself a swift kick (or maybe more) in the pants!
Just as I FINALLY changed the focus of our visits to Harvey from MY changed lifestyle and plans to how can we help HIM have a brighter day when we are there – what can we do to make him more comfortable, what can we remind him of that might bright a smile to his face, what can we show him that might give him a beautiful memory –
I need to realize that this isn’t about ME. The world does not revolve around me or my feelings. And if it DID – I should be thanking the powers that be that I had the privilege of KNOWING these fine people. I got to share their lives for a beautiful time. I received love from them, and gave it back in return. What more beautiful gift is there?
Nothing lasts forever. We should be mindful of that, showing those we love in every way we can think of how much they mean to us. How joyful we are to share some time with them. How lucky we feel to know them and occupy the same planet. How rich we feel and how full our hearts are.
There are people who go through life never making a close friend. They feel alone, that there is no one who might help them if needed. They feel empty inside, maybe hurting or numb, maybe afraid to reach out and take a chance. These are the people we should feel sorry for.
Yes I will miss these people, but how rich I have been in friends! How many kind hearts and souls I have known! I will concentrate on the memories we built, thankful that we had a special bond. I will carry them in my heart, and in my pockets wherever I go. I will let the current friends I have know how I feel – maybe until they ask me to stop – that it’s embarrassing them. That would simply make me smile. What a lucky person I am!
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creativeartworksblog 
So true!
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🙂
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What a way to turn the poor me/why me thoughts around, Linda! I love this!! And I love you!
We have lost many friends too (and family). And I have had the same blues as you (about that), but YOU inspire me daily!! And while I know one person can’t replace another, you have definitely helped me by changing my focus!
In regards to Harvey: I was telling the brief story to my son-in-law’s mother yesterday (about your move to Thailand and two weeks later, Harvey’s fall and stroke)… when I told her he sometimes thinks he’s living on mars with multiple wives and children… without missing a beat she said, “so he’s happy?!?”
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hahahahahaha. While I wouldn’t describe him as, “happy,” he does smile a teeny, tiny bit when I talk about his ‘harem.’ Regarding the other, I truly believe that attitude is all, and that you can make changing the way you look at things a survival skill. I love you, too, Sweet Sheila.
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Just yesterday, I was thinking to myself, “I wish my granny Arbaugh were still alive”. Oh, the things I would do for her, how I would take care of her the best anyone could love and care for another, and the conversations we would have! How much she would love her great-grandkids. I usually don’t think like that. It was just a moment, just a thought. God is the one in control of the times and seasons when we need people in our lives. We have to concentrate on the now. Now it’s my turn to be the wife, the friend, the mom, the grammie that loves everyone so completely, so freely, so much. My granny always spoke of her mom and dad like they were just down the road. Just too far to travel to get to. I know how she felt.
Linda, you have a way of making people think. Lots of love.
Lisa V.
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Thank you for your kind words, Lisa. I appreciate your taking the time to write. It sounds like you carry Granny Arbaugh around in your heart, bringing out memories when you need them, encouraging you to be as much like her as possible for your family now. What a wonderful legacy and role model! I like your granny’s description of her mom and dad being ‘just down the road.’ Just beautiful.
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