For Senior Readers Only – 2

Tina Ann

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•Anyone who says their wedding was the best day of their life has clearly never had two candy bars fall down at once from a vending machine.
 
•The biggest joke on mankind is that computers have begun asking humans to prove they aren’t a robot.
 
•When a kid says “Daddy, I want Mommy” that’s the kid version of “I’d like to speak to your supervisor”
 
•It’s weird being the same age as old people.
 
•Just once, I want a username and password prompt to say “CLOSE ENOUGH”.
 
•Last night the internet stopped working so I spent a few hours with my family. They seem like good people.
 
•We celebrated last night with a couple of adult beverages …… Metamucil and Ensure.
 
•You know you are getting old when friends with benefits means having someone who can drive at night.
 
•Weight loss goal: To be able to clip my toenails and breathe at the same time.