It’s my mom’s birthday today. My main memories are of her sitting in her chair in the living room, one small dog sitting in the chair on each side of her, and a big board propped up so that she could work on the New York Times Sunday crossword puzzle, plus the Cryptoquote in the paper. She usually finished both.
Her dad didn’t think she should go to college, but allowed her one year at the community college in Nevada, Missouri. She graduated one credit short (physical education) of a degree from the two-year college program in that one year she was allowed. Most people thought she was highly educated, due to her vocabulary (a product of reading voraciously and the crossword puzzles :0) ). It was funny that I could tell how angry she was by the words she used – in that they got longer and longer the angrier she got. She could stand on her feet and cut you off at the knees verbally. She did this at city meetings in Tulsa OK, when she was upset.
She had a delightfully silly side, ‘speaking’ for various dogs in a high, delicate, babyish voice, insisting that you react to what ‘the dog said.’ Thankfully, you only had to react – she didn’t require that YOU speak in a high voice to the dog…
I’ll never forget her bailing us out financially when our son was going to a private school in Tulsa which had a big tuition. My husband was working in Tulsa that year so that our son could attend the school. He and our son were living with my in-laws.
After we signed the contract at the school, my father-in-law decided he didn’t want them to live there and insisted they leave. My husband found an apartment, but we couldn’t afford to pay for both the apartment there, our home here, AND the tuition, even with both of us working full time.
My mom called and I tried to just talk to her as if nothing was wrong. It didn’t work. I told her what the problem was, and that we were trying to figure out what we could do. My mom said, “Stop worrying. I will pay the tuition for the school.” I hadn’t cried when telling her about it, but I cried buckets when she said that. My husband did, too, when I told him. He had been feeling like a failure, trying to be strong for our son while we tried to figure things out.
She’s been gone a long time now, but I FEEL her sometimes, usually when I’m sticking my neck out, trying something completely new that scares me. She encourages me to try to be the best person I can be. Quite a woman. I miss her so much.
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