Dying to Laugh

I’ve told you that I spent 8 years doing medical transcription for a group of 8 really busy general surgeons. I was a ‘necessary evil” (exact quote) that they basically took for granted until I heard them say, “All you have to do is type what we say,” too often. The rotation of doctors in our office took two days. I spent two days doing my regular job, but also typing ‘what they actually said’ and printing it off. At the end of each day I printed off what they had actually said and left a copy on each doc’s desk.

At the end of the two days, the docs’ were laughing, but also begging me NOT to type what they SAID, but what they MEANT to say. At the end of my work there, I said my goodbyes and gave each doc a copy orf what I had kept over the years. Their copy showed who said what. I could hear the laughter all the way down both halls. It was a nice ending to a nice job.

Here are some more of the ‘bloopers’ than made me laugh out loud –

“Both breasts are inverted.”
“This lady goes out in the sun a lot, including her back and chest.”
“This gentleman recently was remarried and has no significant complaints to his rectum”
“She has returned to work and is eating eight hour days.”
“This lady had a left breast biopsy when she was a freshman in high school, about four years ago. She has been pregnant since then, but not carried to term.”
“The patient seemingly suffers from chronic abdominal discomfort associated with eating particularly bowel movements.”
“She recently got a new pair of glasses, and the bridge of her nose rest on this.”
“She will go to the Radiology Suite under ultrasound guidance.”
“She states she has had a mammogram of her esophagus done at the Little Rock V.A.”