Charles Schultz – Peanuts via lovethispic.com
I was born worrying.
I really didn’t believe this quote for most of my life, thinking I could forestall all kinds of bad things by cautioning those I loved and then worrying until the perceived danger was over -as if I had control. It has taken me a long time to stop this – for the most part.
The newest worry was when my husband went to an auction in the next state over from us recently. I did help him prepare, making him take his phone and programming the GPS with the address, in case it was one of those places that was really hard to find.
He called me while I was in the kitchen cleaning the floor, I guess, because I didn’t hear the phone ring. (He calls ‘home’ rather than calling me on my cell.) I played the message on the answering machine, but the ONLY thing I got was that it was my husband. It was so garbled that, after playing the message over and over and not being able to understand any of it, I erased it. I then called him back, only to get the message he was unavailable and to leave a message. I told him I got his call, but the message was garbled and to call me back. Over the next hour or so I called and left more messages. He didn’t call.
I was to the point I was imagining that he had been arrested and his one phone call had been so garbled I couldn’t do what he needed me to do, like call a lawyer, come to the station where he was being held, etc. I also imagined was a car wreck and worse, since he hadn’t called me back.
I was a basket case by the time I heard the driveway detector. I ran out to find him pulling into the garage, safe and sound. I asked him – quite calmly, I thought – why he hadn’t returned my messages. He looked bewildered, then checked his phone, seeing the umpteen messages on it. We checked his settings and it was set essentially on “O” volume and no vibrator. :0(
The whole point of this is to admit I haven’t given up worrying altogether, although I notice our son responding on the chat program with, “Don’t worry” more than I would like. I realize I can’t stop bad things from happening, although I may be over-the-top on “preparation” now…
As I said, I was born worrying.
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