These were both sent to me by my dear friend Cathy. I laughed out loud. :0)
Category Archives: Funny Signs – Humor
Humor Needed
Vince, the sign guy – Indian Hills Community Center
Filed under Funny Signs - Humor, Indian Hills Signs, punny
“Vince” Therapy
“Vince” the sign guy, brings up my spirits each time I find more of his puns on the Indian Hills Community welcome sign. Some of them bring a smirk, some a groan, some make me laugh out loud. Always, they lift my spirits that there is some real humor left in the world when I need it so badly from time to time. I’m happy to share some of my ‘therapy’ with you! :0)
Vince Rozmiarek – Vince, The Sign Guy
Filed under Funny Signs - Humor, Indian Hills Signs, punny
Feeling Old and Creaky
Rivercity Pilates
Yesterday I went out and did about 20 minutes of pulling up small “weed trees” beside the shop. I’m trying to get these pulled by hand because they are too much for the wire in the weed whacker. Even though I only did that one session, my back hurt so badly when I was cooking dinner I had to ask my husband to come stir the chicken I was browning.
I’m going to redouble my efforts today on my yoga. It’s taken a back seat to my yard work, and my body is apparently telling me that is a mistake. I need to make time for both. I have to learn this lesson over and over – being a bit slow-witted – learning that the stretching and relaxation is essential to my well-being. :0(
@Britton65Sam on X
Filed under exercise, Funny Signs - Humor, taking care of yourself
Amazing Facts You Need to Know
(sent to me by a friend. I’m STILL laughing)
HelpGuide.org
_______
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it.)
If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
(Now that’s more like it!)
The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(O.M.W.!)
A pig’s orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
(O.M.W.!!!)
A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death.(Creepy)
(I’m still not over the pig.)
Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
(Don’t try this at home; maybe at work.)
The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male’s head off.
(Honey, I’m home . What the…?)
The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It’s like a human jumping the length of a football field.
(30 minutes. Lucky pig! Can you imagine?)
The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)
Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still can’t believe that pig …quality over quantity.)
Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Something I always wanted to know.)
The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Hmmmmmm…….)
Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you’re ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)
Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(Okay, so that would be a good thing.)
A cat’s urine glows under a black light.
(I wonder how much the government paid to figure that out.)
An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain.
(I know some people like that.)
Starfish have no brains.
(I know some people like that, too.)
Polar bears are left-handed.
(If they switch, they’ll live a lot longer.)
Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(What about that pig? Do the dolphins know about the pig?)
Notice
“Stupid & Weird Signs” – BoredPanda.com – Rokas Laurinaicius and Veja Elkimaiciute
Filed under Funny Signs - Humor
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