I’m being a very good girl. I’m eating my raw veggies with a bit of dressing as my mid afternoon snack after taking my husband a bagel loaded with French Onion cream cheese and Chives.
I did my two sessions of exercises with weights yesterday and yoga, and will do my longer session of just yoga today. As I type, I’m drinking my second bottle of water. Since my eyeballs are floating with all the water, maybe I am just retaining water, though I’m definitely moving more, running to the bathroom particularly after the second bottle…
I’m much more motivated when the scales are looking impressed, but that hasn’t happened in several days. I’m determined to build good habits here, though, so I keep on keepin’ on.
I acknowledge that I am getting older. It’s much better than not.
The thing I am hostile about – feeling a definite emotional slap in the face – is that when the talking heads on TV are talking about ‘The Elderly,’ they are talking about ME. I want to bite them in the leg, and I haven’t had a rabies shot.
We are described as ‘vulnerable.’ They are mainly referring to us that way in regard to Covid-19 and getting the vaccine protection. I acknowledge that my husband and I are more at risk from dying from this awful virus, and we have both received the two shots. The thing I resent is that we are being discussed as if we are all one person, one block of sheep, a group that only matters tangentially to the more important matters we’re facing in the world.
Well, THIS OLD BROAD has a lot of fight left in her. My husband and I have long realized that we have never – and probably WILL never – think like other people of any age. We have never been representative of people of our age on almost any subject you can name. And I think that’s probably true of the rest of the ‘elderly.’
We are individuals, as are the people of any labeled group. We have different goals, different needs, and react differently to the same set of circumstances.
I guess what I’m saying is that being called ‘elderly’ and treated as if that MEANS someone can assume anything about me is my new PET PEEVE. I’m not normally a hostile person (although my husband has always described me as, “mean as a snake.”)
I’m not aging ‘gracefully.’ I’m aging, trying to wring out every drop of joy possible from each and every day, finding wonderful, creative people whose work amazes me, new things to learn and try, a new motivation to get and stay as healthy as I can be for as long as I can, enjoying the people who make my life a joy and the beauty around me.
1) You can’t count your hair. 2) You can’t wash your eyes with soap. 3) You can’t breathe when your tongue is out. Put your tongue back in your mouth, sure you can still breathe, you fool.
TEN (10) THINGS I KNOW ABOUT YOU:
1) You are reading this. 2) You are human. 3) You can’t say the letter ”P” without separating your lips. 4) You just attempted to do it . . . You idiot! 🙂 6) You are laughing at yourself. 7) You have a smile on your face and you skipped No. 5. 8) You just checked to see if there IS a No. 5. 9) You laugh at this because you are a fun-loving person — and everyone else does it, too. 10) You are probably going to send this to see who else falls for it.
It was mealtime during an airline flight. The flight attendant asked passenger John, “Would you like dinner?” “What are my choices?” John asked. “Yes or no,” she replied. SMART ASS ANSWER #5
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket. He opened his trench coat and flashed her.
Without missing a beat, she said, “Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub.”
SMART ASS ANSWER #4
A woman was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store but she couldn’t find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, “Do these turkeys get any bigger?”
The stock boy replied, “No ma’am, they’re dead.”
SMART ASS ANSWER #3 As the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window, the policeman got out of his vehicle and approached the kid, “I’ve been waiting for you all day.”
The kid replied, “Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could.”
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
SMART ASS ANSWER #2
A truck driver was driving along the freeway and noticed a sign that read: Low Bridge Ahead. Before he knows it, the bridge is right in front of him and his truck gets wedged under it. Cars are backed up for miles.
Finally, a police vehicle comes up. The cop gets out of his car, walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, “Got stuck, huh?”
The truck driver says, “No, I was delivering this bridge and I ran out of gas.” #1 SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow’s final exam. “Now class, I won’t tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack, a serious personal injury, illness or a death in your immediate family. But that’s it — no other excuses whatsoever!”
The smart-ass student in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, “What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?”
The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering.
When silence was restored, the teacher smiled knowingly at the student, shook her head and sweetly said, “Well, I guess you’d have to write the exam with your other hand.”
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