I’m Good

It’s very satisfying to know what you want – to simplify things in your life to the point where you can just sit back and smile as it becomes more and more like what feeds your soul.

I used to plan everything. I had lists that explained other lists. And I never reached the end of a to-do list in my life. I was constantly overwhelmed, feeling ‘less than’ most of the time, feeling that if I just got up earlier, tried harder, I could cram more into my day, feeling that I had really accomplished something.

I didn’t realize this, really, until my husband and I got sick in February with almost disastrous results. Our son flew in from Thailand, took care of us, convinced us to basically walk away from all the stress of what we couldn’t keep up with anymore and retire in Thailand where we could be close to him.

We moved here the first of April and we both felt the stress falling from our shoulders almost immediately. We started making plans to get healthier and build our lives around more restful pursuits. My husband had his stroke two weeks after we moved, so our lives have changed in ways we never imagined.

After making sure we were doing all we could do for him, I decided to concentrate on what my life would be like going forward. I decided to build the rest of my life around –

• Lack of stress where possible
• Finding and embracing joy in the little things I can do during my days and evenings
• Delighting in trying to fit into a new country, trying to learn the language, learning the customs, taking advantage of opportunities to meet new people, learning new things, and more.
• Letting go of anything I can that I can do without – that includes a minimalist style of living – but giving myself permission to buy something that means a lot to me; enjoying spending my time on things that give me a challenge and personal joy – such as trying to teach myself to draw and painting the sketches, working on a jigsaw puzzle, listening to music, reading wonderful books, learning things on the computer, watching favorite movies on the TV…
• Staying in the moment – soaking up all the feelings, enjoying people who mean the world to me, both here, and across the world from here, reaching out to let them KNOW how much they mean to me. I have learned first-hand how quickly life can be taken from you. I just plan for the day now. I may not be given tomorrow. And that is enough.